RAW Report 1/31/11 Providence, RI

Tonight’s post Royal Rumble RAW starts with music and pyro. HHH is in the opening music.

Announced for later, Edge Vs. and tonight there WILL be a winner!

Ricardo is announced. He comes out to the stage and announces Alberto Del Rio. A mariachi band with a traditional Mexican dancer come down the ramp. Alberto comes out in a SL63 AMG Mercedes. Alberto supposedly bought the car today after winning the Royal Rumble Match last night. King comments on how many times Ricardo said Alberto Del Rio after the Royal Rumble Match was over (No clue when the Royal Rumble ended, but Ricardo seemed to go on forever, well after many people had left their seats.) King says they needed more cow bell.

Heat for Alberto. He announces himself, more heat. He says you people never, ever listen. He told us it was his destiny, but we didn’t listen! Ricardo copies what Alberto says. He says tonight they’re celebrating Alberto! He’s headlining WM! Even though they don’t deserve it because they’re a blue collar town, but he hired the best mariachi in Mexico. They only play for el presidente and Alberto. He says this isn’t Justin Beiber music, this is real music! He has something to tell us. As the winner of the Royal Rumble Match he can choose who he’s facing at WM. He can face the World Heavyweight Champion or the WWE Champion. He’s decided and will tell us now. He says something, Ricardo repeats it, then Miz’s music cuts them off.

Miz and A-Ri out in very nice suits. Miz says before Alberto makes his decision, he wants to congratulate him, it’s impressive. Not as impressive as winning MITB, cashing it in, beating Orton, beating Orton again to retain the WWE Championship. Alberto nods. Miz says he hopes Alberto chooses to face him at WM. Miz will still be the WWE Champion when WM comes around. He can’t say the same about Edge. He’ll lose at the Elimination Chamber. He wants to tell Alberto something. Last night Edge was celebrating. He said he’s going to embarrass Alberto at WM. He mocked his accent and Champions don’t wear cute little Eddie Bauer scarf and even says the cars Alberto drives are rentals. Ask A-Ri! He gives Alberto his word. A-Ri says Edge said he has no respect for a second rate JBL meets Tito Santana like Alberto Del Rio.

Alberto smirks at them. He says he knows Miz and to him this is some ploy to make him chose Edge over Miz. Is Miz lying to him? Miz asks really? Really? Really? Alberto took out his buddy Christian. He doesn’t respect Alberto. He just thought he’d tell Alberto.

Edge’s music. He comes out to the ring in a plaid button down, jeans and sunglasses. Edge mocks a mariachi player on his way into the ring and gets great pop. Edge says Miz is right, absolutely right. He doesn’t like or respect Alberto. Miz is wrong about one thing, he wouldn’t say things like that behind his back, he’d tell him to his face. See, he will be Champion at WM and if Alberto chooses to face him, Edge will be him. He’s the Rater R Superstar – rolling his R’s. but he already knew that, didn’t he?

Alberto says it’s his destiny to be the greatest of the great. And at WM he will be – looking from Edge to Miz – the new World Heavyweight Champion! Edge says to take this with him. Edge hits Alberto in the face. Mariachi, Miz and A-Ri flee. Alberto takes an abandoned guitar and goes all Jeff Jarrett on Edge. Guitar to the head, then Alberto locks on the cross arm breaker. Refs out to help Edge as Alberto and Ricardo leave laughing. Edge in the ring holds his arm on the mat and looks rather pissy.

– Commercial

Video of Alberto choosing to go after the World Heavyweight Championship at WM. Edge’s cheap shot, but he was the one left prone on the mat.

Cole talks about Edge having to face Miz later.

Ding-Ding! King hates this – And I quote, “Tonight, for the first time ever, we’re going to have a RAW Rumble Match. Seven Superstars will participate. The winner of the RAW Rumble Match will go on to face the WWE Champion at the Elimination Chamber PPV. The other six will battle in the Elimination Chamber Match itself. Tonight’s participants are – Orton, CM Punk, JoMo, R-Truth, Sheamus, Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler (Jerry chants – Cole is green! King wants him to read it again.), and John Cena.”

WWE Tag Team Championship Match – Kozlov & Santino w/ Tamina Vs. Nexus (Husky Harris & Michael McGillicutty)

Kozlov and Santino out with Tamina on his arm. Tamina’s wearing a blue and black tight strapless dress, hair hanging straight down her back. McGillicutty and Husky out, of course Husky wearing his Nexus hat.

Santino and McGillicutty lock up, Santino takes him down with a side headlock, then down to the mat. McGillicutty backs Santino into a corner, McGillicutty stomps rather than a clean break. McGillicutty flies at Santino who moves and tags out. Kozlov in hard, shoulder blocks to McGillicutty in a corner. McGillicutty kicks Kozlov and tags in Husky. Kozlov pushes Husky, then ducks an arm and takes Husky down. Hold on Husky and over for Santino to tag in.

One kick stops Santino, but he comes back a bit with blows until running into Husky and a fist. McGillicutty tags in and Husky sends him to splat Santino in a corner. Husky slams into Santino, then McGillicutty covers for two. Neck breaker to Santino for two. McGillicutty throws Santino out over the top, Tamina over to check on him.

– Commercial

McGillicutty pins Santino for two. Kozlov yells and reaches for a tag, but McGillicutty has a front facelock on Santino on the mat. Santino yells and crawls for his corner. To his feet, but the McGillicutty hits a forearm to Santino’ back. McGillicutty tries for a cheap shot at Kozlov, but gets a head butt for his troubles. McGillicutty turns into a Santino arm drag and heads for Husky.

Husky and Kozlov tag in. Head butt, then Husky into a corner. Big boot then another couple head butts. Kozlov hits Husky with a hard push and pins, but McGillicutty breaks the attempt. Drop kick to Kozlov and Santino tags in. Santino pulls the top rope down and McGillicutty flies out. Santino hit’s the cobra on Husky for three.

Winners – Santino & Kozlov

Kozlov, Santino and Tamina celebrate up the ramp. Orton runs by them to the ring. RKO to McGillicutty. Husky up and reaches for Orton, but he also eats an RKO. “Randy!” chants. McGillicutty has rolled out of the ring, Husky still face down on the mat. Orton approaches, looks down at Husky, then slowly steps back into a corner. He watches Husky, breathes hard and waits.

“Randy, Randy Orton, do not do that!” Punk’s voice as he comes out to the stage with Mason Ryan and Otunga. He tells Orton this isn’t something he should do. It isn’t something Punk would do. Punk says Randy over and over and asks if he has to say please. He’s not going to beg him, but for once in his life, take some advice and don’t do it. If Orton kicks Husky in the head right now, there will be serious consequences and repercussions. Orton continues to watch Husky intently. Orton seems to have calmed a bit. He looks up at Punk on the stage, down at his feet, then back at Punk. Orton looks up at the fans who cheer loudly. Then to the other side, more cheers. Orton breaks into a sick smile. Back into the corner, Orton lines up and punts Husky’s head. Punk, Otunga and Ryan run for Orton, but he flees over the barrier and into the crowd. Punk, Otunga and Ryan into the ring, to Husky’s side. Punk, kneeling, looks up at Orton who stares back.

– Commercial

Video of Orton’s attack on New Nexus, the punt of Husky, then fleeing the ring. Cole rips on Orton in a huge way. He says King should be worried as Orton’s going to be in the ring with King tonight. King says Punk’s also in that match.

Ted, mic in hand, in ring gear, out with Maryse on his arm. Maryse is in a slinky, sparkly light pink dress. Ted says King’s career is over, Ted’s is just starting. It’s time for King to step aside for guys like Ted. Why doesn’t he do the right thing for the future and give Ted his spot in tonight’s RAW Rumble. Cole stands and wants to handle this. Cole calls him Teddy and asks how disrespectful can one man be? Has he ever met King? He’s a legend, a HOFer. You’ve heard of the show stopper, King is the scene stealer. There’s no way he’s going to let his selfish, self centered, narcissistic ego take himself out of this match and give Ted his spot.

King stands up and says he wants to tell both of them something. He’s not giving his spot up to anybody. You know how they always talk about the road to WM? Well, his has always been under construction. He’s been in the WWE for 18 years now and he’s never competed at WM. As far as he’s concerned, his road to WM starts in that ring tonight. If it wasn’t for Cole, he might be WWE Champion right now. See, he can beat the Miz. He knows he can beat the Miz. He’s going to be in the RAW Rumble and will win it. Ted hits King in the back of the head, then runs with Maryse in hand. King gives chase, but he pulls Maryse in front of him. King stops. Maryse then turns around, bitch slaps Ted and stomps off. King then punches Ted as he watches Maryse stomp off. Cole then spends the next couple minutes berating him about needlessly attacking Ted for no reason and making an ass out of him.

– Commercial

Sound of rain. A small cabin. Black boots, black trench step in the frame. Walks up to the cabin. Steps up to the door. Black screen then the date 2/21/11 burns into the screen in small flames.

The Bellas are at announce in red sequined strapless tops, possibly dresses, impossible to see.

Tyson Kidd Vs. Daniel Bryan w/ Gail Kim

No entrance for either, but Bryan’s music is still playing. Tyson’s arms around his waist, they chain wrestle a bit. The Bellas say it was a bet. King asks what was the bet? One Bella asks if he’s seen the movie Cruel Intentions? (That movie has been mentioned a couple times recently on RAW about the Bellas.) Arm drag to Kidd, but he comes back with blows on Bryan, then an elbow and a kick to Bryan for two. The Bellas talk about how Bryan strung them along. Shoulder block to Bryan. Cole doesn’t understand why Bryan would leave them for Kim. Arm drag to Kidd, then kicks to his back as Kidd rolls to the apron. Kidd with a leg drag to Bryan. Bryan works it around, gets his la belle lock on and Kidd taps out.

Winner – Bryan

Kim into the ring with Bryan. The Bellas get up to show tight black pants and above the knee boots. They get into Bryan and Kim’s face. Kim pushes one of them down in the ring. The other takes Kim down. Bryan and the ref try to break it up. Another red out and there’s bodies flying. Was just getting worried about strapless tops when it’s obvious a ref’s arm and the Bella’s hand is covering some slippage! Bryan has a good hold on Kim.

Split screen. Backstage. Miz in ring gear, with A-Ri in tow. Edge, in ring gear. All heading for the ring.

– Commercial

WWE Slam Of The Week – Stills of A-Ri distracting Cena in the Royal Rumble Match so Miz could eliminate him.

Champion Vs. Champion – Edge Vs. Miz w/ A-Ri

No ring entrances, both already there. Justin announces them both. Interestingly, A-Ri is still in his suit.

They lock up. Miz tries to go after the arm Alberto attacked earlier. Edge back off. Side headlock on Miz who tries to go after Edge’s arm. Back and forth, then Miz telegraphs and Edge hit’s a swinging neck breaker. Video of Alberto attacking Edge earlier. Edge stomps away on Miz in a corner. Edge sends Miz to run the ropes. A-Ri grabs Miz’s ankle and pulls him from the ring. Edge over, leans out to grab Miz as A-Ri yells a lot. Miz hangs Edge’s arm up top. Miz send Edge into the stairs shoulder first.

Miz sends Edge into the ring for two. Knees to Edge’s back. Cole says Husky’s being evaluated backstage for his head as Miz works over Edge’s arm and shoulder. Edge up and free, but then Miz wrenches the arm again. Miz pins for two. Miz uses the ropes to wrench Edge arm, then A-Ri with a blow from outside behind the ref’s back. Miz pins for two. Miz back on Edge’s arm as Cole talks about how Miz out maneuvered Orton, out wrestled Orton to win last night. King asked about how Miz eliminated Cena from the Royal Rumble Match.

Spinning kick to Miz’s head. Edge tries to set up for a DDT, but Miz reverses and slams Edge’s arm. Arm hold on Edge in the center of the ring. Edge makes it to the ring and Miz has to break the hold. Shoulder block to Miz through the ropes. Edge rolls Miz up for two. Miz comes back slamming Edge’s arm down. Miz wrenches Edge’s arm, holding Edge on the mat. Cole keeps going on about Miz being so awesome.

Edge works to his feet, blows to Miz’s head. Edge telegraphs and is kicked for it. Miz and Edge both hit big boots at the same time in a beautiful shot! The ref starts counting them down. Both up at 8. Miz rushes Edge, but then eats mat with a flapjack. Edge then slams Miz face first to the mat for two. Edge reverses Miz in a corner and rolls him up for two. Miz kicks Edge in the face while Edge still sits on the mat. Miz pins for two.

Miz climbs but into a kick from Edge. Edge stands, pulls back his hair (I keep catching myself pulling my hair back as Edge does pre-spear.) readies to spear – But Miz side steps and Edge face first into the corner.

Cena on mic, way up in the stands, a house box. He says they’re all cheering for Miz. Cena starts a “Miz is awful!” chants. Cole is royally pissed. Spear from Edge for three.

Winner – Edge

Cole is still ranting, say this is stupid. Edge waves up to Cena as he leaves the ring. Cole is worried about Miz who’s now over selling the spear. Cole is up and ranting as he talks to A-Ri and Miz. Cena is all smiles and hanging with fans up there in the nose bleed section.

– Commercial

King and Cole talk about Stone Cold Steve Austin hosting the new Tough Enough. Cole calls it ‘TV’s original reality series.’

“Excuse me!” Vickie says Edge might have won tonight, but he won’t on Friday on SD. He’s defending the WWE World Heavyweight Championship will be defended in a way it’s never been defended before.

Divas Tag Team Championship Match – Eve © & Natalya Vs. Lay-Cool (Michelle McCool & Layla)

Natalya and Eve to the ring. King talks about the changes in the Divas Championship Match at the Royal Rumble and how Michelle McCool was robbed. Lay-Cool to the ring. Video of the locker room earlier with Layla and Michelle argue about pulling weight in the ring. They made a few nasty comments to each other, then decided it was the ref’s fault and they’re all good friends again.

Natalya and Michelle lock up, Natalya takes Michelle down for two, then one. They roll around a bit, then a big back body drop to Michelle. Michelle tags out. Layla looks at Natalya and screams. She drops to the mat on her knees, arms and head tucked in, only showing her back – basically turtling up. Natalya grabs her by the waist, picks her up, but then drops her. Layla pushes Natalya a bit, then turns, runs screaming at Michelle and flings herself into her friend’s arms – the ropes between them even though her arms and legs are around McCool, screaming and crying.

Michelle talks her up, then looks up at Natalya smiling. Layla runs into a Natalya suplex for two. Eve tags in and hit’s a drop kick on Layla, then a couple kicks and clothesline. Eve’s standing moonsault only gets two. Layla manages a back kick, but then is picked up and set up top. The ref is busy with Natalya and Michelle kicks Eve in the head. Layla hits move she calls the facelift on Eve, then full body covers Eve for three.

Winners – Lay-Cool

Layla outside getting coddled by Michelle. Lay-Cool celebrate up the ramp as Natalya tends to Eve.

– Commercial

Dance Off – Mark Henry & Khali w/ Singh Vs. The Usos (Jimmy & Jey)

Henry, Khali and Singh out dancing and laughing. Josh Mathews out to take King’s place. Josh says he hopes someone punches Cole in the mouth. Cole gloats that King can’t do it or he’ll be fired. The Usos are already in the ring. Henry, Khali and Singh still dancing.

Ding-Ding! And I quote, “As I see the Usos stand across the ring for Khali and Henry, let’s face it, they don’t have a chance. So I’ve decided to alter tonight’s contest. So instead, these two teams will compete in a ‘Dance Off!'” Josh is shocked and appalled. “Each team will have the opportunity to strut their stuff in the ring and the fans will have the opportunity to choose the winner. Gentlemen, let’s booggy, woogy, woogy!”

The Usos start. One brother tries to be sexy at the ropes, gyrating low. The other tries to do the robot. Cole is dancing at announce like a goober and Josh is embarrassed. Then the Usos stand together, one arm around the other’s shoulders. They put their heads together and smile wide. They think they did a great job.

Henry calls to the fans and they love him. Khali can’t dance, Henry rolls his belly, dances, tries to help Khali, then does the arm hang. The fans are happy. Then the Usos attack them. Henry slams one, Khali drops the other. Khali tries to pin the Usos in a confused mess of not understanding any of it.

Video of Orton’s attack on McGillicutty and Husky earlier.

– Commercial

Again the rain, cabin, boots, trench, 2/21/11 promo.

Josh and Cole introduce the trailer for HHH’s ‘The Chaperone.’ Shorter trailer than was shown at the Royal Rumble last night.

RAW Rumble Match – Winner faces Miz at Elimination Chamber, the rest in the EC Match

Justin announces the RAW Rumble Match. JoMo out to the ring. Video of JoMo’s sick moves to land on the barrier, walk it like a balance beam, then jump to the stairs to avoid touching the floor.

– Commercial

Cole announces that on SD, Dolph and Lay-Cool will face Edge and Kelly Kelly – Edge World Heavyweight Championship Title will be on the line!

JoMo and Sheamus start the match. Sheamus with a side headlock takeover on JoMo. Shoulder block to JoMo. Sheamus runs the ropes until a drop toe hold, then arm drags from JoMo. Arm hold on Sheamus. Sheamus punches JoMo in the face to get free. JoMo face first into a corner, then Sheamus tries to send JoMo from the ring. JoMo fights back, then kicks on Sheamus in a corner. Punches to Sheamus, but he comes out and nails JoMo with a backbreaker.

Cena joins the match. Bulldog then suplex on Sheamus. Cena grabs JoMo for an AA, but he lands on his feet and hits an enziguri on Cena. JoMo stomps each of them in turn. JoMo punches on Sheamus, then tries to get him out over the top. “Cena” chant. Cena up and knocks JoMo away so he can work over Sheamus.

Punk joins the match. Punk rushes Cena with a high knee in the corner. Bulldog on Cena. Blows to JoMo, then blows to Sheamus in a corner. Cena runs the ropes and into Punk’s kick to the head. Sheamus works to eliminate Cena while Punk and JoMo fight an almost both go over! Sheamus with blows on Cena. Cena fights back with a belly-to-belly!

R-Truth joins the match. R-Truth in with clothesline to Cena, then a slap to Cena and a hip toss. R-Truth ducks Cena, then kicks him in the head. R-Truth send JoMo over the top, but he hangs on and skins the cat. JoMo grabs R-Truth with his feet and pulls him over the top – both men are hanging from the top rope! They both try to skin the cat, but only JoMo can do it. R-Truth tries again, but still can’s skin the cat! He ends up looking a bit silly and using his legs to get back in. Punk then attacks JoMo, Sheamus on R-Truth. Sheamus then on Cena. Sheamus tries to send R-Truth out as “Cena” chants fill the arena. Cena gets Punk up for an AA, but Punk wiggles out. DDT to Cena. Sheamus still on R-Truth. Punk on JoMo in a corner.

King joins the match as Cole says he’s a wasted entrant and King should be doing his job at announce. King in with blows to everyone and they all sell them as if they were the stiffest blows they’ve ever received, even Sheamus hit the mat hard. King gets Punk up to send him out, but Sheamus attacks King. Sheamus tries to eliminate King. R-Truth tries to eliminate Punk. King holds on tight to not be eliminated as Josh and Cole argue about King. The count down starts and Punk slides from the ring. He crawls back under the ring as he did last night.

Orton joins the match, but only has eyes for the missing Punk. Orton looks under the ring, finally finds Punk and drags him from deep under the ring. Blows on Punk, then they both are in the ring. Clotheslines to JoMo, Sheamus, then Orton back on Punk hard. Orton send Punk out over the top. Then R-Truth from behind Orton and he’s sent out over the top!

Eliminated – Punk & Orton

Orton’s pissed and shocked. Cena stares in shock.

– Commercial

JoMo on R-Truth, then King joins him. Sheamus on Cena with a backbreaker. Cena comes back with shoulder blocks, then slams Sheamus to the mat. Five Knuckle Shuffle to Sheamus. R-Truth rushes Cena, then gets sent into a corner, same with JoMo. Cena splashes them both in the corner, then gets them both up for an AA. R-Truth is sent out, JoMo hangs on. JoMo stays on the apron, then locks around Cena’s neck and pulls him out to the apron. They fight out there. Sheamus rushes and ends up out there to. They all fight back and forth until Sheamus and Cena back into the ring.

Eliminated – R-Truth

JoMo tries to suplex Sheamus from the ring. Shoulder blocks to Sheamus, then Sheamus pushes JoMo off, but he hangs on by the tops of his feet hooked onto the bottom rope! JoMo slides back in, grabs Sheamus and sends him over to the apron, but he comes back over with a shoulder block to JoMo. Cena grabs Sheamus and locks on his STF. JoMo goes for starship pain, but Cena on Sheamus are to close to the corner and only an elbow of JoMo’s hit them. JoMo cradles the elbow on the mat. Cena and Sheamus sell starship pain even though it wasn’t hit. King grabs JoMo and sends him over. JoMo somehow slides down and lands feet up on the apron, hands on the floor! He hooks his feet around the bottom rope and pulls himself back in.

JoMo off a corner with a flash kick to Cena’s head. Sheamus on JoMo. JoMo bounces Sheamus’ head off a corner. Sheamus sends JoMo over the top and he manages to hang on! Brogue kick sends JoMo to the floor.

Eliminated – JoMo

Sheamus smiles down at JoMo. Sheamus turns right into Cena and an AA. Drop kick from King to Cena! King tries to send Cena out, but he hangs onto the ropes. Sheamus knocks kick out of the way and beats on Cena who still hangs on. Sheamus grabs King and slams him into Cena. Cena hit’s the floor.

Eliminated – Cena

King looks down at Cena, completely shocked. Sheamus rushes King who drops to the mat as Cena reaches up and pulls down the top rope. Sheamus flies out over the top.

Eliminated – Sheamus

Winner – Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler

Cena into the ring and raises King’s arm as Cole gets to his feet and screams at King that he won’t be going to WM! King won’t be winning, show off all he wants, but he’s not going to WM! Backstage Miz and A-Ri watch King on a monitor, both smirking. King poses on corners as Cole screams about hell freezing over and that King’s road to WM will hit a dead end in three weeks! King continues to celebrate and ignore his announce partner.

Biggest pop
Orton
Cena
King
JoMo

Biggest heat
Cole!
Miz w/ A-Ri
Punk/Nexus
Sheamus

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